December 2, 2015 News

David Letterman Donates Late Show Memorabilia To School Full Of Stephen Colbert Fans

Former late-night host David Letterman will be donating a number of pieces of Late Show memorabilia to his alma mater, Ball State University, whose student body is undoubtedly comprised of almost 100 percent Stephen Colbert fans.

According to the university president, Letterman made a visit to Ball State on Monday night; before leaving, he gifted the school a number of Late Show Emmys, props, and set pieces that students will surely be disappointed to hear are from the time before Stephen Colbert took over the show.

“Oh...,” these students will likely say, before returning to their phones.

The president went on to say that the pieces would be part of an installation at the school called “The David Letterman Experience.” We assume this installation will be housed in a closet in the university’s theater department, where it will be more commonly referred to as “The Stuff Some Former Student Left Here.”

Letterman—who managed to hold down CBS’ late-night time slot for almost 22 years before Stephen Colbert decided to give it a shot—initially returned to his alma mater this week to interview directors Spike Jonze and Bennett Miller in front of a sold-out crowd of students. Once the auditorium full of millennials stopped chanting, “Stephen! Stephen!” they were likely confused to see a heavily bearded and sourly sarcastic old man take the stage.

This was not what they had expected when it was announced that a late-night host would be appearing on campus.

Even more confusing to the crowd of undergrads—most of whom were probably introduced to the concept of a “late-night talk show” within the last six months—is the fact that the bearded man never once mentioned Jon Stewart or John Oliver. Instead, he wanted to talk about a movie called Cabin Boy, which the students had only ever heard about from their weird, much-older cousins.

Anyway, we’re sure somebody associated with the school—probably a parent—is excited that David Letterman left behind a bunch of his detritus. Hopefully, for the students’ sakes, Stephen Colbert will at least mention Ball State in a tweet, and then they can turn that into a plaque for the new library.