March 29, 2016 News

Lamar Odom Thankfully Receiving The Media Shaming He Needs To Get Well

After a TMZ source spotted recovering addict Lamar Odom in a bar over Easter weekend, the former basketball star has been the subject of numerous stories reminding him of his struggles with substance abuse. Thankfully, he is now receiving the kind of widespread media shaming for his disease that he needs to get well.

Last October, Odom became the subject of intense, excoriating public scrutiny after falling into a coma due to a drug overdose, the sad nadir of a lifelong struggle with addiction that began when his father reportedly made him try crack as a child. The press truly did its best to somehow break through Odom’s extended coma to make him feel appropriately bad for losing his ability to speak and walk. However, while the media has continued to dog Odom’s every move since he’s been out of treatment, many outlets have shown a reluctance to further punish him and thus give this emotionally fragile person that final push into the abyss of guilt and self-loathing that will surely cure him.

Luckily, TMZ cared enough to never give up on making Odom feel terrible, even during this extremely difficult time. Unflagging in its efforts to let Odom know that the entire world is watching and ready to therapeutically pounce on the first whiff of potential failure, TMZ reports:

We spoke with multiple staffers and patrons at the bar who tell us Odom arrived to Johnny O’Brien pub in Sherman Oaks, CA with 2 unidentified male friends just before midnight on Saturday -- and stayed until around 1 AM on Sunday. Staffers confirmed Odom ordered 3 Remy Martin drinks and paid for them himself.

Let the healing begin!

As if it weren’t already helpful enough to publish this exposé of a recovering addict’s personal setback so that every tabloid on the internet could throw Odom’s personal failure’s right back in his face, TMZ went the extra mile by publishing a follow-up article just seven hours later. In this cherry on top of the shame sundae that will doubtless cure Odom of his genetic predisposition to addiction, TMZ helpfully reached out to anonymous sources to report that the people Odom loves most are “really, really sad,” and that it’s all his fault.

Indeed, it’s just the sort of intervention with his closest friends, family members, unnamed insiders, gossip publications, and millions of internet rubberneckers that this man who felt pushed to the brink by an inescapable spotlight really needs right now. And as long as the media continues to remind Odom that having common symptoms of an incurable disease means that he is a worthless fuck-up who keeps letting everybody down, he might just beat this thing yet!