This weekend marks that special time of year when we take time to tell our dads just how much they mean to us and how thankful we are for their paternal presence. This year, honor your dad by showing him one of these eight photos of celebrated actress Diane Lane. That oughta get him going.
Here’s Diane Lane at the premiere of Batman V Superman back in March, looking just as effortlessly stunning at 51 years old as she always has. This photographic proof that Diane Lane is still both culturally relevant and objectively attractive should get your dad going pretty good. And that’s nice. Your dad deserves it.
Diane Lane hasn’t lost a step in the past three decades—and don’t think your old man hasn’t noticed. This photo should send him on a nice trip down memory lane, maybe back to that time he watched Unfaithful on HBO after your mom went to bed. That really got him going.
Honestly, the fact that Diane Lane is a full-grown, mature woman and not some spritely young starlet is exactly what gets the job done for your pops. He doesn’t feel like a lecher, yet he doesn’t feel like he’s settling either. Diane Lane just really gets him going, ya know?
Hot dog! Now that’s an age-appropriate hottie guaranteed to get your dad’s engine revved.
Honestly, if this saucy two-time divorcée doesn’t do it for your dad, we don’t know what will.
Maybe when your dad looks at this picture, he can pretend that’s him Diane Lane is snuggling up against instead of Academy Award-nominated actor Bruce Dern. The thought of being that close to Ms. Lane should get his blood pumping almost as much as that time he watched Must Love Dogs on HBO after your mom went to bed.
Look, your dad masturbates. He’s going to masturbate to these photos of Diane Lane—that’s a given.
It doesn’t mean he’s not still in love with your mom, and it doesn’t make him a pervert or a weirdo. It’s just that sometimes he likes to treat himself—specifically in the privacy of the hall bathroom, hunched over some photos of beautiful, mature, A-list actresses. Father’s Day is his time for that. So make your dad happy by sending him these photos. He’s earned this.